Woody Allen as 007?

casino royale
Originally uploaded by jerebo.

Has anyone seen Casino Royale? I've always been curious, but having just picked up the LP soundtrack for only 3 bucks at a yard sale, my appetite is whetter.

I mean if the following liner notes don't sell it, I don't know what does.

(Note Mort Goode has an active imagination and made up some words.):

CASINO ROYALE IS TOO MUCH FOR ONE JAMES BOND!

Imagine a new James Bond!

Imagine Sir James Bond!

Imagine good Bonds and bad Bonds, cowboy Bonds, Indian Bonds, girl Bonds, and a villainous Bond -- enough Bonds to start Boy Scout Trooper 007. It's a portion of the fancy of CASINO ROYALE.

Picture five dexterous directors devising diabolic delights. Conjure up visions of the nestling, natural 007 and a 007 au naturel. Indulge your reveries around super-sleuths and super-sleuth-slayers; closestsful of unraveled writers scheming way to present more Bonds; a hundred plus British beauties. It all adds up to a number -- 007!

Whimsy yourself with thoughts of songs written by Academy Award honored Burt Bacharach and Hal David (Burt composed and conducted the entire score); Herb Alpert & the Tijuana Brass playing the title theme; Dusty Springfield singing The Look of Love. They are all here in this seductive sound track. They compound the interest.

"Casino Royale" is superaBONDANCE -- the biggest Bond Bargain yet! See why Bonds have more fun. Pleasure yourself with sights of bacchanalian Bonds setting new misbehavior patterns. Watch scenesful of stars break the Bond of the ordinary.

It's 007 times 007 times 007 ad infinitum. It is multiple Bond that totals up to "Casino Royale."

Imagine!

Mort Goode


This almost sounds like a Mad magazine parody.

If that's not enough, here's a partial list of the cast: Peter Sellers, Ursula Andress, David Niven, Orson Welles, Woody Allen, William Holden, John Houston, George Raft, and Jean Paul Belmondo.

And it's got five directors!

This sounds so wonderfully dreadful. Even more so than A View to a Kill.

Since I don't belong to Netflix can someone please add this to their queue? I'll make martinis!